Antisocial Enjoyment


The past few months, I have thoroughly enjoyed being antisocial. I don’t seek to be that way, but I just get into what I am doing and then, I don’t really feel like talking.

For example, I will go downtown and sit at a coffee shop or bar and start reading. I may make some small talk with the bar tender if it is one I have seen before and they recognize me. But more often than not, I just sit, read, and then enjoy a drink and maybe some food.

A few of my friends say reading at a bar is not really “acceptable.” Well, I never got that rule book so I say, whatever, screw these imaginary rules. Why would reading at a bar be less acceptable than reading at a coffee bar? I see other people reading at coffee places all the time. So does the presence of alcoholic drinks make it mandatory for social interaction? I would hope not.

Just this past Friday, I went to a restaurant bar, a place I had gone to several times before. I had about an hour to enjoy a drink before watching a ballet across the street. So, I sat and ordered a drink. I was about to pull out my book but this gentleman came and sat down. He just started talking and talking. He was a nice guy and about 25 years older than me, but I just didn’t care about what he was saying. I really wanted to read and enjoy my drink…alone. I could have told him to leave, but I am too nice at times, particularly if the “offender” is nice. I hate to be rude. I can totally do rude, but it’s usually only if approached in a rude and disrespectful manner. So, if someone is just being nice and bit too chatty, it is hard for me to scream….OMG-please just go away.

Other than reading, I like to take a few random pictures. Pictures of my drinks, my food, my book, the light hitting the bar. I am sure I look like the lonely lady at the bar with a book and her camera phone, but you know what, I am happy and don’t really care. It is my quiet time where I deal with stress.

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I am sure I would enjoy someone tagging along with me (and sometimes that does happen), but if I want to go and my friends are busy, I will go. I spent too many years waiting for other people to do things with me. No more. If I want to go out. I go. If that means I go out alone, so be it. And clearly, I am perfectly fine with it as I seem to feel invaded when that time is interrupted.

Has anyone else ever felt this way? I would like to think that I am not the only antisocial person out there. And for those of you who are like me, how do you nicely say – leave me a lone?

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